Each day there is enormous pressure on RB to learn and grow intellectually. In turn, there is pressure on me, as his daycare provider, to make that happen. The prevailing thought behind this pressure is the lack of siblings he has. There is no one for him to imitate or strive to be like. No competition and no socialization with others his age. The answer to quell the critics is to be consistent.
You might think being in charge of one child is extremely easy. Only one to chase around, to discipline and to teach. In my experience, that one child is very difficult. There is no other child to default to. There is no other child to put forth as an example. There is no other child to offer help for the weary parent. And for sure, no free babysitting as many parents unfairly utilize!
As the parent of an only child, I am the sibling that RB looks up to. However I want him to behave, I must behave. Whatever I want him to do, I must do. And I must be consistent with what I teach, knowing that his eyes are focused on me 100 percent of the time. Being constantly “on the ball” can be difficult at times and is something that needs to be remembered when deciding upon the size of family wanted.
As an adult, I am aware of the negative aspect of having bad habits. Removing bad habits from a child is infinitely harder than attempting to change only yourself! I am also aware of the innate ability in all children to be manipulative and persuasive. According to Zen Family Habits, once your child knows that they can weasel their way around a rule or out of a punishment, they have your number. How true that is! That is why teaching your toddler now, and sticking to your guns is very important. Requiring (or in some cases, fighting!) your child every night, for example, to put his dinner plate and utensil in the sink, will eventually pay off in the end.
Each time my son brings out a new toy to the living room, I have him put the last toy he was playing with, back in his room and to the place it has its home. Most times it is a struggle which ends in the new toy going back to his room, because sometimes, in his eyes, it is not worth the hassle to play with! One night, after he was told it was time for bed, RB acknowledged me, put his blocks back into the box and took the box back to his room. The next night, he did it again! This is the fruit of consistency! Eventually, the commitment to being present for your child as much as you can will result in a child that lives your preferred lifestyle with ease and without question. Well, until they become teenagers of course!
