This is a guest post by Sue Atkins. Sue is a parenting expert, coach, and author. Her website provides practical guidance for bringing up happy, confident, and well behaved children. Sue regularly appears on BBC’s Breakfast Television, The Jeremy Vine Show on BBC Radio 2, and she also hosts a monthly “Ask Sue” parenting Q&A on BBC Radio Surrey and Sussex.
Getting older children to open up and talk to you can become a little harder as your children mature, and scientists still aren’t sure whether the differences are due to nature or nurture, but the differences do seem to exist between boys and girls and I know first hand as I have one of each!
One difference that’s especially noticeable to parents of boys is that it can be harder to get them to open up in communications with you about their emotions and feelings.
My son happily talked sport, school or cricket, but was less open about how he was feeling compared to my daughter.
If you’re the parent of a son whose door to chatting seems more closed than it is open, don’t despair.
By understanding why your son doesn’t feel comfortable discussing his emotions with you can help you relax and feel more confident around this whole area. I have found by being more flexible myself and putting the book down that I’m reading, or just being available to talk when my son is ready, means that we do get those “magic moments” where we chat, connect, and where I can support him when he needs me to.
It’s not about forcing by relaxing and making sure your son knows that when he’s ready to talk, you’ll be there to listen (regardless of the time)!
Often, I found engaging in a physical activity such as playing football in the garden or having an evening of Monopoly, or something that my son enjoyed made him open up to easily and more naturally without a feeling of pressure. So find a simple activity where you are both relaxed so the conversation can just flow naturally.
Continue reading for practical methods – The Do’s and Don’ts of keeping it comfortable and encouraging for your son to open up and talk with you.
