By Renee Martinez
I have a very exciting meeting today with someone regarding as an interesting opportunity. I’ve never met him face to face so of course I want to look nice, which frankly as someone who works from home is not a necessity in my normal daily life. Well, yesterday I had maybe seven little skin thingi’s removed from my face. Needless to say I look like I have major acne problems.
Yikes! That is scary!
So after I get the boys off to school, I settle #3 and #4 into the couch for some quality morning TV. Then proceed to leave them unattended for 20 minutes so I can shower and transform myself into a fashionable beauty. This takes more time than expected, the blistering wounds on my face are challenging to conceal. In fact, once my mastery is complete, they look like nothing more than big-ass zits that some fool tried to use too much cover up on but had no clue. This photo in fact does not truly illustrate the largeness of these creatures on my face.
I return from my transformation to find my kitchen in absolute disarray. Tupperware, snacks, napkins, opened pretzels, pretty much anything that was at #4’s level has been removed from the shelf and the rubber bands I placed at each cabinet have been broken allowing him entry. He’s sitting on the floor eating pretzels. #3 meanwhile is enjoying his TV show – oblivious to the world around him.
I start to pick up, I can’t be upset as it’s my fault and I smell an incredible stench. It nearly knocks me over. Then I pick up #4 and realize he’s wet so I begin to change his diaper. When I pull down his pants, a load of poop flops out onto the floor. He steps in it. So I carefully pluck his clothes of one at a time trying carefully not to make more of a mess and decide the laundry room sink would be an easy place to give him a quick scrub-down. As I start to run the water to warm it, he pee’s on the floor. Finally I place him in and start to clean him up. I’m wearing one of the few outfits that I feel looks halfway decent given the fact that I want to loose a few pounds. First I clean his backside, then I turn him around. He puts his arms on my shoulders and hugs me and kisses me. He’s so lovable and cute. Then I smell that God-awful poop again and wonder what have I missed. I take him out of the sink and start to dress him – when I look down I see poop on my shoulders, in my hair – which he must have grabbed and down my back! Holy cow!
Now I’m poopy and zitty!!
I carefully shed my clothes and return to the shower. This time I bring the little guy – but my intentions for getting started early was so I could do a few errands before I have to leave….always expect obstacles when you have kids – or at least the unexpected! Truthfully I think I still smell poop and have a poopy odor surrounding me!
Do you have a funny story to share? I’d love to hear it!
About the Author: Renee Martinez consults and speaks professionally on social media marketing, integrated marketing communications, public relations and branding. She is the president of Ruby Marketing Communications (www.rubymarcom.com), a boutique marketing communications company that specializes in providing branding, social media strategy and integration, and creative services. Her blog (www.lisac95.sg-host.com), provides resources on everything marketing and social media for her active audience.
Renee has contributed as a featured monthly columnist in the monthly jewelry industry publication, JCK on matters related to internet marketing as well as in InStore Magazine as a featured blogger where she writes about developing effective marketing strategies for the jewelry industry using social media. She is the founder of: Social Media Biz Summit(www.socialmediabizsummit.com), the first large-scale SM conference to come to Buffalo, NY; #jewelrychat, a weekly twitter chat for the jewelry industry and www.RaisingBoysWorld.com. Renee teaches social marketing courses at Canisius College in Buffalo, NY for the business school as well as offers small group social media marketing training and educational seminars for businesses in Western New York and beyond.
Renee has dabbled in internet marketing arena since the early 90′s and is not ashamed to call herself a “marketing geek”. From chatting in AOL, “sharing” music on Napster, and teaching HTML classes before it was considered “cool” to developing comprehensive social media strategies, effective public relations campaigns and managing online communities (most recently Chevy Girls Buffalo).
She enjoys being able to help people find their voice online and to create buzz about their product or service that will give them the results they desire.
Renee can be found on Twitter (@reneemmartinez) and Facebook (http:/www.facebook.com/RubyMarCom).
