Over the past week or so, many media outlets and so called experts have taken their shots at Elizabeth Lambert. The U of New Mexico women’s soccer player who committed several infractions, including pulling a BYU player to the ground via her ponytail, during The Lobos 1-0 loss in the Mountain West Conference semi – final game. Just about everyone is terming her behavior unacceptable and many are calling for her expulsion from the team. Even youth players, who I have seen interviewed on the subject, are extremely critical of Lambert’s actions.
Ok, so the behavior is not to be tolerated. It was downright wrong…..so what now? Aside from the obvious notion that “this is not the way to behave, and there is no room for this type of conduct in college sports,” what can our youth athletes, or anyone, learn here? Well, I can promise you that by examining Lambert’s behavior, we won’t learn a thing. The truth is that while she might be a normally tenacious soccer player, Lambert doesn’t act like this all the time. What then was truly going on that day against BYU?
The answer actually lies in Lambert’s level of ‘well being’ in the moment the game was taking place. When our level of psychological functioning is low, we are simply prone to making serious errors in judgment. When our level of functioning is high, the game of life just flows! And the truth is that an individual’s level of well being is almost always taken for granted or viewed as a given. Have you heard one person, even so called experts, mention Elizabeth Lambert’s possible insecure state of mind entering the game? Unfortunately the answer is no! Regardless, in all life situations (including pressure packed games), Lambert, and the rest of us, must learn to tap into the varying quality of our personal thoughts and internal feelings, and choose to act only from a clear and fluent state. Remember, we cannot control the negative thinking that, at times, invades our heads, but we can always control how we react to the world around us.
The essential lesson to draw from the events of this tumultuous soccer game then, is that Elizabeth Lambert’s behavior is simply after the fact. Therefore, understanding and implementing the often overlooked principle of state of mind is truly the key to viewing the world from the inside-out, and a life filled with positive and productive decisions and actions.
Keys to recognizing an errant state of mind, breezing past it, and avoiding trouble:
1. What is the quality of your thoughts in the moment?
2. How do you feel inside?
3. Recall that these thoughts and feelings are bound to change. If you have a negative feeling toward an opponent for example, the thought is neutral and only empowered if you view it as “a call to action.”
4. Understand that thought is simply the illusionary link between whatever occurs in the world “out there,” and the inner reality that we paint for ourselves.
5. Everyone, at times, thinks negative or errant thoughts. There is nothing wrong with you or nothing you need to fix. Just see the thought, and ensuing feelings for what they are, hang in there, and from a natural place of clarity and quiet you will soon find the positive perspective that leads to quality decisions and success!
About the Author: Garret Kramer is the founder and managing partner of Inner Sports, LLC. His revolutionary approach to performance has transformed the way players, coaches, professional teams, and even parents view the athletic and life journey. To learn more about Garret Kramer, visit his website: http://garretkramer.com/
